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Tik Tok – The Mommy Version.

Many of you have probably heard of Ke$ha, and also probably heard her song, “Tik Tok.”

Ke$ha is the embodiment of everything I’m raising my girls NOT to be, God bless her. They’ve never heard a song by her, and I’m totally fine if they never do. I heard this song while riding in a friend’s car, and not only do I find the lyrics repugnant, but her voice is highly annoying as well. Naturally, I decide to write a parody and publicly embarrass myself by performing it at a fundraising event our church did recently.

Corny as it is, I got a lot of positive feedback, and numerous requests to put it online so people could continually torture their ears hear it if they missed the fundraiser. So, here you go. I apologize for the horrendous audio quality. I did a quick recording on my phone because the Nerd and I are insanely busy and just can’t find the time to do a video shoot. At least not without hearing intermittent “Mommy, I need to go potty and get a drink and ride my bike and Punkin took my toy and isn’t sharing and I’m hungry but I don’t like chicken.” And while that was the inspiration for my parody, it kind of cramps my musical style.

Perhaps someday we’ll get time to do a funny video with better sound quality, in the meantime, here’s a cheesy audio recording with a pretty sunset. Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you:

Tik Tok – The Mommy Version

Wake up in the morning and kids are screaming

The sun ain’t up yet but they’re startin’

I’m already steaming

The bus is coming, brush your teeth, and don’t give me no slack

Don’t roll your eyes, you need to share

And no talkin’ back

I’m sayin’

Time to pick up your clothes clothes

Stop putting things up your nose nose

Hurry ’cause we gotta go go

Where’s your sippie cup?

Better turn off that TV

Where did you leave your Chi Chi*

I just took you to the potty

You better stop I’m ’bout to pop

You just spit up down my top

Don’t wait; it’s gettin’ late

And I’ll cancel your play date

Tik Tok on the clock

Mommy’s gonna blow her top, now

You’re movin’ too slow

We need to go

(Repeat chorus)

You’re whining’s driving me crazy

You need to use big girl words

I need to hear, “please and thank you”

I don’t want to see your turds

We’re in a public library

Use quiet voices, don’t shout

This is your warning, if you don’t stop

You’re going to time out

How many times have I told you no no

Let’s go we’re gonna miss the show show

I don’t care if you don’t have to go go

Go potty

Where’d you get my nail polish

Don’t eat that on the floor, use a dish

I so do not have time for this

Chorus x2

There goes the sun

I am so done

It’s bedtime now, Hallelujah

Get in your bed

Lay down your head

It’s bedtime now, Hallelujah


Let the party begin ’cause the kids are asleep

Chorus x2

*Chi Chi is Goo’s beloved blanket.

About Mediocre Mom

I am a wife to the man who was made for me, and mom to three amazing girls: Punkin is eight, Goo is four, and Smush is two. I'm a Christian, a science geek, and completely addicted to coffee. Trying to stay sane one day at a time. Lowering the bar for moms everywhere.

10 responses »

  1. Haha loved it, you’re far from being a Mediocre Mom I’m sure 🙂

  2. Thanks for posting the lyrics and the audio this song is fabulous and funny and relatable. Better than the original 🙂


  4. Thanks for posting! And we may need to do an encore of this at the next one!!! AND YES, I am already planning the next one 🙂

    • I already have a new one in the works! It’s called, “Because I Said So.” I’m doing it to the tune of Beyonce’s, “I’m a Survivor.” Can’t wait for the next comedy night!

  5. Renker, thats such a fantastic song! 🙂 Glad to see you haven’t changed 😛 Miss you! ❤


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