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How about these bathtub toys? Or that push-up bra?

Prior to starting a HFCS/MSG/food coloring free diet for Goo, we had been having some rough days. And not just “I got into the toilet paper and unraveled it,” days. More like, “I unraveled the toilet paper, then when MM asked me to pick it up, I screamed, kicked and hit the wall for 15 minutes,” rough.

Thankfully, within 12 hours of eliminating the junk (so excited about this anyway. I heart organic foods), I had a brand new Goo. Still determined, still strong-willed, but oh. so. manageable. It is glorious. She took a great nap, and slept through the night without waking up screaming bloody murder and lashing out because we wouldn’t give her chocolate milk at 4 AM.

Elated at the arrival of my new, independent but not bipolar toddler, I decided to take her along with me for a Walmart run to pick up tape, sharpie markers, and toilet paper (see above). Shopping with Goo is something I previously needed a bottle of wine to handle avoided. But now I have a wonderfully silly, albeit stubborn, toddler, so I brought her along for a much-needed Mommy-daughter outing that didn’t involve mid-store time-outs and hasty exits to the parking lot. Bliss.

We arrived, and it. was. awesome. She ran along beside me, happily pointing out all the colors, cheap crap great deals, and miscellaneous items she came across. We were perusing the baby department when Goo spotted something that made her very excited. I thought it was the stick-on alphabet letters for bath time.

She bounded across the walkway, in front of several strangers.  As one young man entered the area, she raised her hand, pointed gleefully to a large display of padded push-up bras, and said,


Did you want to get play-dough, honey? Or would it be more fun to let the world know that Mommy's boobs need a lift?

In a split second, the thought occurred to me: Great. Now everyone in the store knows that I’m sporting the evidence of three breastfed babies.

A few seconds and several snickers from other customers later, I had lured her back into the baby department, highly amused and only slightly embarrassed. I don’t wear push-up bras. Something about your boobs making contact with your chin just seems unnatural to me.

But since I’m wasting your time on the topic anyway, why is it that the lingerie department is so often near the children’s department? I have girls, so I can usually explain things away by saying that those are for grown-up women, and when they’re older they can wear them. But what if you have a 9 or 10-year-old boy? Shopping for cargo shorts in spitting distance from the thongs seems a little…awkward…to me.

Regardless of the lingerie proximity to the toys, I had a fabulous shopping trip with Goo. I left the store with tape, sharpie markers, toilet paper, and a set of alphabet letters for the bath tub. Maybe I’ll go back for the push-up bra later. She may have been trying to tell me something.


About Mediocre Mom

I am a wife to the man who was made for me, and mom to three amazing girls: Punkin is eight, Goo is four, and Smush is two. I'm a Christian, a science geek, and completely addicted to coffee. Trying to stay sane one day at a time. Lowering the bar for moms everywhere.

One response »

  1. Oh,, Beth this is sooo… funny! I am addicted!


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